May 19, 2005

Moving to Montana Soon

The Boy has called me six times in the past two days.

Six times. That's five more times than he called me during the whole of last month. He wasn't even asking for money. He needed minor problem solving help and to report his progress.

He had his last exam Saturday. His sophomore year is over. He's cleared out of the dorm, stashing the stuff he's not taking with him for the summer at a friend's house. His bags are packed in preparation to board a big ole jet airliner for Montana in two days.

He's also been scouring furnishings abandoned by students who will not be returning next year. He and his buddy will need things to furnish their off-campus apartment next fall. That's right. An apartment. Off-campus, but within walking distance. My baby has signed his first lease. I think that makes him an adult.

I don't know what is more depressing: him moving all the way across the country for the summer or him being old enough to have his own apartment.

What is really depressing is my prolonged inability to get past my "empty nest" issues. I mean geez. Do I think I'd be happier if he was wrapped around me like a piece of saran wrap, unable or unwilling to make decisions on his own? Or how about if he was making bad decisions? Would that make me happier?

Well duh. Of course not.
I just miss him, I guess.

So I say, "Self? Self! Enough already!"

Not surprisingly, Self isn't paying attention.
She's such a stubborn biddy.



Cris said...
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Cris said...

"self" will come to terms with it....when its "right".

empty nest is one of those things that can not be willed away because it is so complex. rooted in our reasons for having children in the first place, inspite of the desire to give them roots and wings, the closure on that part of your life can never be complete because that child is always your child.

We never really stop worrying, we surely don't stop caring. So what is an empty nest but the realization that they do not "need" us anymore.

Once we realize that they still need us, just not in the same way, then it's just a matter of figuring out the details.

In other words, it doesn't get easier, it just becomes different!!

Mel said...

Have I got a brilliant solution for you! I happen to have two 12 year olds . . . I'll send them both to you for three days, then you'll be so grateful for your empty nest you'll send me money. Lots of it. And chocolate.

weese said...

Well if Mel is sending her kids - take mine too. Then Mel and I can dish about empty-nesting.

That Girl said...

The dance of seperation is never graceful. Everyone's toes get stepped on from time to time, we all falter and regroup. I think you're doing a beautiful job.

Eyes said...

I think CONGRATS are in order. You've raised a very successful son -- well on his way into the world!

Keith, RN said...

Our son is about to graduate from photography school and move in with his girlfriend at the ripe age of 22. He still needs us emotionally (and financially!), so I just keep in mind that "the nest" can be stretched many's never really empty.

Love your blog. Just linked to it....