December 18, 2005

In the Moment

Home, home on the range!
Where tampons get flushed down the drain!

Sing it with me, y'all.
You know you want to.
How can you resist?

Put another check mark on the "pro" side of living in suburbia: public sewer systems. I've never lived with a septic system and if I did, I might convert to using The Keeper. My parents, however, live in the boonies. So when insult was added to injury and my period started the day of my stepfather's funeral, I did not sing "Gloria!" in exaltation.

Tis a week before Christmas and all through our house not a holiday decoration is up, not a package wrapped, not a meal planned, not a holiday card sent. Unsent holiday cards are nothing out of the ordinary, but usually we've got the other parts well in hand.

But we are home. Together.
For right now, that's enough.



Anonymous said...

I cannot wait until menopause stops at my door. Bated breath cannot begin to describe it.
Haven't flushed a red badge since I went to the wastewater treatment facility in 8th grade and was horrified by the mess that's left behind, so can't say amen to the joy of flushing. It's still "wrap and throw" in this house.
BTW - still hoping time heals for you and yours.

Gina said...

I was taught never to throw a tampon in the toilet. Ever.
It apparently is still an issue if you have older plumbing.

And, glad you guys are back and can perhaps begin the process of semi-normal.

Melodee said...

One of my most horrific moments of adolesence was when I flushed a tampon in a toilet in Tahiti (seriously) and plugged the toilet. (I did not admit to it, however.) I was mortified. We always flushed where I grew up!

Dora said...

Are you not supposed to flush the tampons??? Where have I been?

Anonymous said...

My sympathies! Holidays take care of themselves.

Eyes for Lies said...

You know, I'm grumpy today, but in light of all you've endured lately -- I should be happy. Here is wishing you happy times ahead!

Elizabeth said...

Oh, you are such a liar. I bet you sing 'Gloria!' in exaltation every time Aunt Flo comes around. Walkin' through the house...

Angels we have heard on high
That my time of month is here
and the men of the world reply
'We don't want to even hear'
GloooooOOOO ooooOOoo OOOooo ooooria! let me flush it day-oh!
GloooooOOOO ooooOOoo OOOooo ooooria! hope it doesn't clog the toi-oi-let-oh!'re home together and we know exactly what is going on. Let me just say your women is so not subtle. Really. Shouldn't you homos be a little more discreet?

cbar said...

Hope you have a wonderful holiday where tampons can be flushed safely and without fear of clogging toilets!! : )