June 15, 2006

Git Yer Own Sorry Ass Up!

On the Metro, I listened to two women converse.

What's that? You think it was more like eavesdropping? Well. You're right. It's a favorite pastime of mine. But in my defense, they were talking pretty loudly.

One of them said, "I's got to fight him every morning for an hour! I's got to fight him for an hour! Every damned morning! He say, 'Git me up at 6:30' so I wakes him up at 6:30 and den we fight for an hour until he finally gits his sorry ass outta bed at 7:30."

The other woman pursed her lips and tsked-tsked as she shook her head in commiseration.

I thought, "WTF? That's a horrible way to start the day! He oughts to git his own self up!"

When The Boy lived at home, he would never expect anyone to get him up in the morning, oh hell no. He learned at an early age to get himself up and ready for whatever the day may hold.

If he had waited for me to wake him, he might still be asleep.
It were enough trouble gitting my own sorry ass outta bed!



Middle Girl said...

My son, no prob. He got up, showered & dressed before I could hit the first snooze. Daughter? not so much. When she was in HS there were mornings I literally dragged her out of bed. Turns out though, she was miserable at the school. We found an alternative, and while not the easiest, or earliest of risers-gits herself up just fine now.

WenWhit said...

I adore your ass.

weese said...

we had the opposite of the only daughter - our daughter completely self sufficient. Ferri$ on the other hand... well... lets just see how he does next year at univeristy. while we doze dreamily on those fall mornings.

Gina said...

Currently it is my three year old who gets my ass out of bed. Usually much too early.

I'm sure that will eventually be reversed and I can take out my revenge on him when he's in school.

Val said...

I tend to be an early riser naturally and then my daughter was a very early riser (5am), but we have both mellowed with age (she's now almost 6!) and see 6-ish as a good rising time. Weekends have found both of sometimes sleeping til 7! My wife, however - could sleep until disturbed and even then is capable of ignoring!

pinkme said...

Oh, I'm a horrible mom! I still wake both my boys up. I bought my oldest and alarm clock but got pissed when it continued to go off for 30 minutes.

Anonymous said...

If someone didn't wake me up, I'd still be asleep. I am a sorry excuse for something.

Elizabeth said...

Oh the boy the boy the boy. How freakin' perfect is the boy?

Geez, someday he's gonna do somethin' like let out a big honkin' duck fart during a quiet part of some play and the whole illusion will be broken.

Hey Mon-soor Garcon, I know you read this bloggy thing. Tell us your flaw? I bet your right ear is slightly lower than your left ear. C'mon. Spill iiiiitttt. I think you need to do a Mohairy Winder.

What's that? No flaws!

Gasp! You're JESUS KID! (I used to think the kid on the Wonder Years was the Jesus Kid. That kid always did the right thing. Mr. Mor-freakin-ality).

Oh great Jesus Kid. Thou art so great. Thou gettest thyself up without any help. And if thou lost thy shoe I shall find it and build a shrine to thine shoe. I shall hoist it in the air and say, "The Shoe! It is the Holy Shoe! Worship the holy shoe of the church of the Jesus Kid and thou shall be heeled! Hi-ever, do not smell the shoe, do not put thine nose to the Holy Shoe, only worship the shoe. Ask the shoe for it's blessing and thy sole shall be blessed. And it shall be good.


Suzanne said...

Ah eb, how wonderful of you to recognize the innate superiority of our fine young man!

But this post wasn't about his perfections. It was about the ladies on the train who, rather than pick their noses, were sharing details of the trials and tributions of their mundane lives.

Now quit being mean and go wake up your son. Isn't it past time for him to raid your stash of beer? :)

Elizabeth said...

I'm just kidding!!

Suzanne said...

eb, of course you were! At least I thought so. Since you've confirmed it, I know so. :)

WenWhit said...


Taradharma said...

I got tired early on of trying to get the kid up -- so i bought her a radio alarm clock, showed her how to set it, told her it was her deal to be up and ready on time, and what time I'd be pulling outta the driveway every work day.

Nuff said.