Obsession

Hello, my name is Suzanne and I'm a binge-a-holic.

"Hello Suzanne!" the crowd calls out.

It's been two months since my last confession.

"Gasp!" says the crowd.

Over the course of those two months, I've ingested a ton of the target of my current binge. Well. Maybe not an entire ton. Let's see. Five containers, each containing 21 ounces. So like 6.5 pounds. May as well be a ton.

It started out innocently enough. Wendy and I were shopping at Trader Joe's. While perusing the displays of nuts, candies and other luscious snack options tantalizingly lining the aisles, my eyes were drawn to a neat stack of square plastic containers filled with brightly colored candies.

Ah-ha! My brain snapped to attention. Those candies appeared to be the little fruity jelly disks I so adore but rarely see in stores! I felt that familiar tingle run up my spine. I looked around furtively to see if anyone was watching. The coast was clear. I made a beeline to the display for a closer look.

Sure enough, there they were: the delectable delights of my fantasies! Soft. Sweet. Fruity. Round. I wiped the thread of drool off my chin as I loving placed a container of them in our cart.

These candies come in an assortment of five colors and flavors: red is cherry, orange is orange, green is lime, white is grapefruit, yellow is lemon. Their centers are soft and smooth, ever-so-slightly sticky. Their exteriors are crusted with sugar creating a tasty delight unsuitable for carrying around loose in one's pocket or purse. Each one is a little larger than a quarter but about five times as thick.

One of each color constitutes a Suzanne Serving. Those five candies equal a perfect Suzanne Snack for a quick pick-me-up any time of day. I have favored flavors but not a favorite flavor. I don't always eat them in the same color order, but I always eat a white or yellow one first. Sometimes I bite them in halves but usually in thirds. I never eat them whole.

Don't look at me like that. It's not like I'm some obsessed freak or something.

I should have known right away that first box was the beginning of something, shall we say, untoward? I think I did know, but I jumped off the cliff anyway. Self-indulgence personified, that's me. The next week found me schlepping off to the Traitor Trader Joe's near my office to replenish my supply. I bought two containers on that trip. Two weeks after that I was back again for two more. I've half a box left and think it'll carry me through the weekend.

But after that? Then what?
Somebody help me.

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