June 19, 2006

It Happened on a Monday

I accidently ate a lima bean today.

Yes, yes. It was a horrific experience, as awful as you may imagine. I'm happy to report I have fully recovered and no long lasting detrimental effects are anticipated.

My friend Lisa and I were lunching at Los Tios. I ordered the chicken enchiladas, which are served, typical of many restaurants of Mexican ilk, with sides of refried beans and rice. I said "No beans, please!" because I don't like refried beans. I don't like them here, I don't like them there, I don't like them anywhere. It's a texture thing.

The rice at Los Tios is dotted liberally with vegetables: little chunks of carrots, bright green peas, pieces of green beans, and, I quickly noted, a smattering of lima beans. Lima beans fall into the same category as refried beans in my world. Yet despite my lack of appreciation for such things, the existence of those lima beans on my plate was not a cause for consternation as they are easily pushed aside.

Except for that one rogue lima bean, the insidious little bastard who hid beneath the cheese and salsa verde liberally smothering my enchiladas. There it lay, snickering quietly, awaiting the perfect moment to slip unnoticed onto my fork and from there into my unsuspecting mouth.

I cringed as I bit into it, immediately aware of my mistake; the soft smooshy texture did not blend well with the other more pleasing soft smooshy textures mingling in my mouth. My mind raced frantically, considering the options available to rectify the situation.

In the end, I, being the mature adult that I am, did the only thing a mature adult could do. I chewed it thoroughly and calmly, albeit quickly, then washed it down with a large gulp of ice water, making no mention of it to my luncheon companion.

My mother would be so proud.



maxine said...

Uno mas margarita por favor.

nina michelle said...

I actually cried for you...


well okay I didn't really but I do commiserate. I feel the same way about guacamole and pumpkin pie. Texture *is* everything. Well that and both look like they have been eaten once already...

may you find peace...


WenWhit said...

*sigh* Poor, poor Suzanne. What is one to do when faced with snickering little limas???

There were no such unwanted critters in my Chipotle rice today. ;p

Deb Heller said...

Lima beans in Mexican food??!!?!!! That is atrocious. Ugh. I haven't seen little bits of carrots in my mexican rice either. Sure am glad Los Tios isn't out here on the Left Coast! Heh.

I always ask for black beans instead of the re-fried pinto beans. Much nicer flavor, too.

whispers said...

hey--quit eating the lima beans.......save them for those of us who like them.

poor lima bean, to be consumed by accident and not appreciated.

do it again and you will be reported to the Lima Bean Defamation Society!

Middle Girl said...

Oh the horror! Lima beans? in rice? Yuk and double Yuk.
You are to be commended for showing considerable restraint.

Gina said...

Lima beans without anything else?


Lima beans with rice?

I've done it.

One of the best Mexican restaurants around here also puts a bunch of veggies, including Limas, in their rice.

I think I would have liked to have seen your face when you realized what happened. I think I would have laughed.

tiff said...

I will eat your refried beans and you can have my rice. Blech - rice.

Rice with GREEN BEAN pieces? Double blech.

Teresa said...

Clearly your Mexican restaurants suffer for their lack of contact with the border. Otherwise they would know not to sully their rice with such nonsense.

I'll never be able to confront lima beans again without imagining them hiding and snickering, which really increases their charm factor for me.

WenWhit said...

Scout hit the nail on the head. "Mexican" food here in Virginny is really of the South/Central American influence, and VERY different from what one finds in Texas and Southern California.

sporksforall said...

I was going to agree with scout too (which is good since she's my honey) and note that Mexican food with lima beans sounds really good to me (Southerner that I am) AND how impressed I was with how brave you were Suzanne. It's hard to be brave in the face of snickering food.

Sam said...

Is now a good time to mention the huge vat of chili I just made with red kidney beans, black beans and white beans??? :P

the determined dieter said...

Whenever I eat at Chipotle (which is often) I have to stop them from putting beans in my burrito. They look at me like I'm crazy. "But, why? They're free." Yes, but they're also yucky.

Glad to know there's another bean-hater out there.

Damn snickering beans, think they're so smart.

Anonymous said...

Lima beans are on my list of four foods I will not eat under any circumstances. Shudder. I feel your pain.

Pisces75 said...

I hate lima beans and peas.
I love refried or black beans. I consider myself very sensitive to food texture. After your post it makes me wonder why I do like refried beans?? They are of similar texture. Strange.