May 4, 2006

It Fit In My Pocket, So I Figured What the Hell?

Thanks Jennifer.

I AM not alone in the world.
I WANT another beer.
I WISH to turn the page.
I HATE. Wait. No I don't.
I MISS my life.
I FEAR this is my life.
I HEAR but do I listen?
I WONDER why I ever quit smoking.
I REGRET that I can't have a cigarette tonight.
I AM NOT strong.
I DANCE with my lover on soft cotton sheets.
I SING often.
I CRY not often enough.
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS whatever may need making.
I WRITE and hope someone reads.
I CONFUSE myself.
I NEED to focus and be productive.
I SHOULD drink less, sleep more, eat better.
I START freaking out if I think too far into the future these days.
I FINISH with a smile on my face.
I'M GLAD I'm breathing.



Kiker said...

Suzanne, I just wanted you let you know that you have been in my thoughts lately. I am sorry this is such a rough time for you. But I greatly admire your honest approach to the situation.

All my best,

Eyes said...

I think I am going to bum this one off of you :) Thanks for sharing!

I can so relate to how you feel about freaking out when you think of the future.

I also related to what you wrote about always wanting to rescue people. I was a rescuer from long ago -- and before I married, I too shrugged it off. So many people think it takes two havles to make a whole. I say it takes to wholes to make one couple.

C said...

Suzanne, I've been thinking of you too. I know you're going through a rought time but I need to refute your one thing YOU ARE STRONG! You wouldn't have gotten as far as you have now if you weren't.

Joelle said...

I like this entry Suzanne. I wanted to let you know, you write on your blog, I read it. Often. And I always like what I read.

Jennifer said...

You can pick my pocket anytime. Have I ever told you that I get a least one visit a day from somebody reading your "40 Questions"? Your strange but true fact of they day, brought to you by the letters J-E-and-N.


Princess Wild Cow said...

Re: Tequila for breakfast: Dos de Mayo...Suzanne's Personal Holiday!

Re: Your know, when the going gets rough...well, some folks are always there and some aren't...I am thinking of you...

Re: List...stealing from you and thanked Jennifer...

Wish you could hear the loons right now...their haunting, melodic cry is beautiful.

Kevin Charnas said...

Excellent...I love it...the realness of it and I can taste it.
And it's familiar.