September 12, 2005

Suburban Slug

I can't be the only woman who goes through this. This particular component, or perhaps side effect, of the whole phase of the moon experience, the cyclical joyousness that those of the fairer sex suffer endure embrace tolerate every 28 days or so.

I'm talking about one specific element of what PMS means to me: a complete and total inability to motivate my sorry ass to do anything remotely resembling a productive task. Some months it is more subtle than others. This month, subtlety would be welcome. This month, a harsh taskmaster with a large whip lashing me unmercifully about the head and shoulders while issuing commandments in a loud harsh tone couldn't motivate me to even do the simplest of tasks.

That's one thing about having children in the house. When children are counting on you, there is no option to completely flake out and be a slug. At times like this, I really miss that structure, that neverending demand. Motivate? Why bother? Where's the fire? What's the rush? It'll wait until tomorrow. Or the next day.

I need something to snap me out of the lethargy and back into my usual productive, detail-oriented, Tee crossing and Eye dotting, getting-the-job-done self. Can someone loan me a toddler for a few days?

On second thought, perhaps I should just relax and go with the flow. Perhaps I should embrace my hormonal limitations and revel in the sheer pleasure that is suburban slugdom at its finest. I'm really quite good at it, after all.

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6 comments:

Mel said...

One adorable three year old, packed in bubble-wrap and cushioned in styrofoam peanuts is on her way!

Udge said...

Gee, I get that slug thing too - just that I don't have anything to blame it on :-)

Anonymous said...

Let uz zee...hmmm...vat can vee do to znap you out of thees zluggishnez, ya? Here iz vat you do. You call up zee local Stop und Shop und you azk-uh, 'Do you have zee Prinze Albert in zee can?' Und they zay, 'Yez, vee have zee Prinze Albert in zee can.' Und you zay, 'Zen you better let him out becauz-uh he needz to pee pee.' You zee how much fun zat would be?

Let me zay, furthermore, zat your requzt-uh for a zmall human zat normally drivez zee peoplez crazy iz very dizturbing and it meanz vee muzt zend you to zee plaze to have your head examined further. Do not worry. You will be in zee good company with zee Charlie Mason in zee zell next to you. It will be fun, ya?

Dr. Seymour Jagermeisterwhistlestein

shivanataraj said...

interesting blog...

made me think & reconsider a few things... & consider a few other for the first time...

look fwd to reading more...

Anonymous said...

"Go with the flow"? Come on. Seriously. You didn't even comment on the pun!

WordsRock said...

Oh Anon, what fun is a pun that requires a comment? Truly the joy is just in flinging it out there and seeing if others pick up on it.

Suzanne