December 14, 2004

Eyebrow Maintenance

This past Saturday afternoon I spent a few hours with Bonnie. Not the visiting dog Bonnie, rather my friend Bonnie.

She had just had her eyebrows waxed. How did I know? Well initially I noticed the area just under her left eyebrow looked a little puffy and pale, a sure sign of recent trauma. I discreetly peeked to see if the right side appeared the same. It did. Then she said "I just had my eyebrows done" as if I needed such confirmation. I obligatorily admired her now perfectly shaped eyebrows. They did look good. I was also reminded it had been too long since I'd tended my own.

My sister, way way back in the day, demonstrated to me the agony of hair removal by waxing. I will never forget the afternoon she waxed her bikini line in my kitchen. Yes, in my kitchen. Sisters share their spaces that way. The vivid memory of her prancing maniacally in a tiny thong, screaming bloody murder as she ripped away the wax and hair leaving pinpoints of blood forming on the surface of her skin---well, that vision has stayed with me for over twenty years. The memory is as fresh today as if it had happened yesterday.

I've never waxed anything. No, no indeed. I saw the prancing, remember? I heard the screams. I will employ other methods to control my body hair, thank you very much.

The Boy, taking after his father, tends to a uni-brow. But, metrosexual that he is, a uni-brow will not do, no way no how. At first he shaved it, but now he plucks. Whatever. I'm glad he keeps them neat. I'm certain, should he ever discover, he would be ever so pleased I mentioned it here.

A good friend, who shall remain nameless to protect the identity of her boy, also has a son who tends to a uni-brow. Her young man, however, doesn't seem to mind. His mother takes him to her salon. They lure him into the back room where they perform the torture waxing. He emerges with a dazed look on his face, his eyes slightly glazed, a faint smile on his lips. A new man! With two eyebrows instead of one.

So last night I evaluated the state of my eyebrows. I contemplated briefly how easy it would be to just shave them off entirely and draw them in with a pencil.

Then I came to my senses and got busy with the tweezers.


Unknown said...

I once had a Brazilian bikini wax. Ow. OW. Never again. In regards to the eyebrows though, I actually enjoy the waxing of those since my friend's wedding this last summer. She's a cosmetologist and decided an hour before the big event that my eyebrows could be more perfect so she attacked me with her tweezers. Ow. OW. My eyebrows looked great, but dang the pain was great. Now it is all wax and all razors for me.

Eyes for Lies said...

It's the tweezers for me too :)

Jennifer said...

The wax for me, baby. I tried tweezing my Brooke Shields eyebrows exactly twice. Death seemed more appealing. One brief wax job, my face changed, my looked changed, and I was hooked.

Tweezers are a deadly weapon in hands like mine. Give me the brief sting of the hot wax any day of the year.

Pisces75 said...

LOL!! I loved that post. I can SO relate!

I used to get my eyebrows waxed. I only did it because my cousin would do it, in her salon, without charge. Now that she has changed professions I don't do it anymore. I won't pay for pain like that. And after having the eyebrows done I would never do anything near my bikini line. Yowza!